Failure is not the end

Going into our first day with clients in a one-on-one session, I was very nervous and very excited. I could not wait for today to begin, as well as I had no idea what I was getting myself into. It began on a complicated note because I didn't even know if my patient was still a patient at the geriatric unit we are currently having our field work at. The last OT note I saw was dated for 5/6/12 and today was 5/31/12. Fortunately, my client was there for me to attempt to work with.
Right away I struggled with being to authoritative, as I went into the room to find my client, I found him asleep in bed. I know I love my sleep, so I definitely didn't know what to do about my gentleman. Thankfully, my professors help by sending me back into the room to wake him up and begin working with him. However, I immediately ran into my second brick wall. The man refused to want to work with me. I was able to, thanks to the aide of my professor, to finally be stubborn enough to force the gentleman to talk to me for about 15 minutes. I feel as I did well in talking with the fellow and finding out things about his life and things he enjoyed doing. Of course, all the while he was lying down because he wanted nothing more than to sleep. Through this interaction, I learned that I myself need to be more stubborn about working with patients. If there asleep, wake them, if they say "no" keep trying. Even though I was unable to get the fellow up and moving around, we were able to have a little conversation. So will I can talk and carry a meaningful conversation, one that attempts to get at the focus of therapy, I need to jump right in and not doubt myself.
My favorite part was that I did fail in my attempts to work with this patient. However, I didn't allow it to affect me personally. I have learned that yes, some things will work great, and some things will fall flat on it's face. My attempts to work with this gentleman and to coax him into working with me, failed. I was able to also "attempt" to follow the OT as she attempted to work with this man as well. Again, I was proven that failure is part of the job as the man refused to work with her as well, even getting angry and stating, "I'm getting tired of this damn s**t." This proves to me that just because I failed, doesn't mean it's my fault.
His papers, history and reports, were very confusing and mixed up. Between OT, SLT, and PT, this man was completely independent to completely dependent. Some had him working on balance while sitting while others showed him mobile. It did say he would refuse meds and OT which gave me some information on what to expect as far as personality. While working with the OT, we were able to get him to walk, but that's it. He would not use his UB for ANYTHING. He even walked with his hands clenched behind his back so as not to use them.
I was surprised at how accepting I was at failing. I thought I would take it more personally as if it was my fault. But thanks to pervious fieldworks and professors I have learned that it's just part of the job and to accept it. Thankfully, I was able to do just that and was still able to learn from it as well. I can't wait for Tuesday to come so that I may try again, this time with a different patient!